Suicide Bombers – Criminal Record

Suicide BombersBeing a rock DJ can be an extremely hazardous job – nearly as dangerous as trying to survive as a music journalist.  Please believe when I say this:  on and off, I’ve been spinning heavy rock and metal discs and writing shit about said same nonsense for more than two decades.  There are subtle differences between the two aspects of this conjoined career:  as a journalist, I have to listen to albums, demos, etc., in depth in order to deliver a considered judgement upon their contents, whereas as a DJ I can skip merrily and playfully through the contents of same, cherrypicking what I think might appeal to my extremely choosy clientele…

But, now and again, something comes along that blurs the lines between the two – an album that makes me throw off the headphones, scrape the piece of (black) elastic holding my ponytail in its place and dance around the studio/office like a complete maniac; an album which has the journalist inside me saying “this cannot possibly be this good” and the DJ counterpart agonizing over which tracks to select ‘cos I just wanna play the entire album from beginning to end and go grab my girl and hog the floor all muthafuckin’ nite….

Yes, ‘Criminal Record’, the debut album from Norwegian sleaze merchants Suicide Bombers is just such an album.  I’m not going to waste hyperbolae:  these four doods have the swagger, the angst, the confidence, the melodies, the toons, the balls to take on any other rawk ‘n fuckin’ roll act in a straight up bitch fight and beat the living shit clean out of them…

OK, it’s a clichéd as fuck – but do we really care?  No, we feckin’ don’t… this is the sort of glam punk pioneered by the likes of The New York Dolls, fucked up the arse by The Babysittters with Hanoi Rocks providing the lubricant, sent over to play with Nikki and the Crüe, who promptly invited Iggy to score a joint off its buttocks and then dragged it kicking and (s)creaming into the 21st century.

There’s a party going on in my stereo… where did I put my fuckin’ invite?

Suicide Bombers - Criminal Record ArtworkTrack list:

  1. Trailer:  History Is About To Begin…
  2. Let’s Rock ‘N’ Roll
  3. Easy Access
  4. Napalm Heart
  5. This Time Tomorrow
  6. Smoke & Mirrors
  7. High On Explosives
  8. Electric Fire
  9. Bombers En Vogue
  10. Teenage Breakdown
  11. Cindy
  12. Princess Socialite
  13. Riot
  14. Outro:  … over and motherfucking out!

‘Criminal Record’ is out now on the band’s own Suicide Records.

To join the Suicide Bombers’ campaign for global domination, visit their official website,, or follow them on Facebook @

About Mark Ashby

no longer planetmosh staff